Queer siblings

Things you learn with queer siblings

We always thought that it’s one thing when you’re queer but it’s another when you have queer siblings as well, given the isolated feeling you have when you’re dealing with a world that’s so quick to judge.

We liked the internet series, My Sister is So Gay (with Loni Anderson, Wendy Michaels, and Terry Michaels), that it made us wonder: what would it be like having a sibling who was queer as well?

Here’s what we found out:

Queer siblings speak

The website Queerty decided to talk to gay siblings and ask them what were some of the things they experienced growing up:

1. “My brother and I are both gay so it makes everything a massive competition.”

2. “Me and my brother are both and I’m glad he told me but I’m worried how our family will react.”

3. “I’m gay, my one sister is a lesbian, my brother is a bisexual, and my baby sister is straight. My parents are immigrants and it took years of adjusting but we’re a beautiful rainbow of a family.”

4. “My sister is a lesbian and I’m gay. I was scared to tell our mom after my sister came out, but all she could do was hug me and laugh.”

5. “My sister and I are both gay. I don’t want people judging my parents for having two gay kids so I’m not coming out.”

How it is with queer siblings

For Erin Faith Wilson, writing for the AfterEllen website, it was a relief that not only did her younger sister Ashley accept that she was a lesbian, she was one too.

“Having a queer sister and being a queer sister has been one of the greatest things I have experienced with Ashley. While our relationship was strong prior to coming out, the magnitude of respect we have for each other grew because we know how difficult it can be to feel different, especially within your own family unit,” Erin wrote.

““We know exactly what it’s like to be queer in our family in particular. We have the same parents, the same extended relatives, etc. So we just know very closely how the other person may feel in certain family situations, be it positive or negative,” Ashley told Erin.

Erin also did some research on the odds on the matter and pointed out a Stanford study that indicated that “the odds that the sister of a lesbian is also a lesbian is significantly higher than sisters with gay brothers.”

“Even though there is less data on lesbians than that of gay men, it was found that queer sisters make up about 1-2% of the female population,” she pointed out.

How about you? Did you have queer siblings when you grew up? Tell us your experience in the comments below!

In the meantime, you can also check out the latest issue of Lesbian Magazine for our article on My Sister is So Gay.

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